Peaceful I sleep, as there is nothing around me anymore. No light, no sound, no fear around. The heartbeat in my chest is a soothing rhythm as I seem to float down this emptiness. As I open my eyes, a gentle breeze passes my cheek, yet I can’t see anything. The breeze turns into a strong wind as I catch my breath and feel myself falling. Though there is nothing around me, I feel myself catching more and more speed. Free falling into a pit of despair as the rapid currents of air make me choke. Unable to breath I start to flail, to claw, to try to grab something, anything. Yet there was nothing. My skin started to hurt as the wind started to hit harder and harder. My arms, now numb, unable to move. Eyes are watering as I fall deeper and deeper, faster and faster. I want to scream, but I hit the ground and wake up screaming.
What is it? What’s wrong? She asks. As I stand there, looking down at bed, hands shaking, mind empty, I try to respond somehow. I don’t know. I think I had some nightmare. I can feel her hand on my back, as she is slowly moving it up and down. It’s okay. You’re here now, she says as she grabs me in her arms and hugs me. I love you. I grab her arm and lean with my head on her chest as I exhale a simple ‘you too’. She starts to giggle. What? I ask, surprised at her reaction. Nothing. It’s just that… She stops. What? She gently strokes my hair and kisses the top of my head. It’s just that you finally said it. You said that you loved me. As she holds me even tighter at her chest. I stop breathing as my eyes widen. I try to gently pull back, but can’t. I am so happy that you finally said it. I’m glad that you feel the same way I do. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t said that you loved me. Her grip on me, stronger than before.
I love you so much. You’re everything I have ever wanted and more. An ideal, perfection incarnate, that’s what you are to me, my love. I am so glad to have met you. As your eyes flicker, they give me hope. As you speak, it soothes my soul. As you move, you give me life. As you are, you give me a reason to be alive. The fact that you are here, in my arms, means the world to me. And I am glad to have you, to love you, to feel you inside me whenever we make love. As there is nothing more beautiful than you are. She continues to speak words of honey, milk and sugar in my ear as she holds me tight. Her touch, careful as not to hurt me anymore, her words intoxicating. You are so big, every time I see you, I can’t help but crave you. You are so good, that my mouth waters at the thought of you. Her hands start to wander in all sorts of naughty places. As she grabs me, bites me gently, pinches me and drools all over. Disgusted, disturbed and afraid of her…
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